The artist is chosen by God to fulfill his commands and must never be overwhelmed by public opinion. Albrecht Druer
In life, sometimes, there exists this conflict between the people around you and the God who created you. You pray to Him, talk with Him, and feel that you are doing what He has called of you to do, but no one around you sees it.
God has the master plan, a blueprint per se, that lets Him know right where each person belongs. To say that you are in the wrong place or doing the wrong thing, especially if it is a positive move you are making, is to say that God doesn't know what He is doing.
People have opinions. There's always a critic. However, the focus of our worlds is to make sure we are fulfilling our place in the world, making God look good.
He has CHOSEN us to do what we are doing. He has picked our destiny that we may fulfill it and the position he appointed for us in his master plan. If you fail to act out your destiny, you are failing to act out your part in God's play, a role that he so desperately needs filled!
God needs you. The people around you need you. Ask God where he wants you and GO!
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Thursday, April 15, 2010
"Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save." -Will Rogers
Wow! This quote is frighteningly true. We rush through our weeks, wish away our days, curse our boredom, but then inevitably wonder where the time went when we find ourselves older than we'd like to be.
Part of the problem is our inability as humans to enjoy the precious present moment and to be satisfied with what we have. All of our lives we, as well as our parents, wished us into the future. When we were born, our parents began wishing we could crawl, then walk, then talk. That doesn't necessarily imply that they weren't enjoying our cooing or immobility, but they wanted more and were wishing away time for it to happen.
When we became small children we wished we were big enough to ride the Ferris wheel or to walk in the deep end of the pool- unconsciously hoping time would speed up. And then we became teenagers who wished we were old enough to drive. When we could drive, we wished we could drink legally. When we could drink legally, we wished we were finished school. When we finished school, we wished we had better jobs. When we got better jobs, we wished we had a family. You get the idea.
We have spent our entire lives wishing away time to reach a point where we are at a better place. I would venture to say that once we reach that place, we start to yearn for some of that time back. I do. I look at my responsibilities now and for a split second miss being a kid with no responsibilities, no sense of time, and the naiveness that allows you to be void of worry and love life. I know that my mom sometimes wishes she were my age again, when she had kids to take care of and a family to do things for because it was in that time that she felt purpose. She is enjoying her life but missing the younger days.
The other part of the problem which this quote brings to light is that we spend so much time trying to find something to do with our time that we waste away our time. Again, we are not content with what we have and need more. I believe this comes partly from our need to be stimulated 24/7. In older days, people could sit around a fire and talk, sing, and sit in silence yet still be amused. This day in age, from babies we are given things to stimulate us. We are sat in front of the TV, shown the joys of the internet, and given gadgets to play with. I am not saying these stimulants are negative, but only that we are continuously being entertained. Because of this fact, we are not happy just sitting in silence (unless of course we are stressed to the max and need a little time away), or even just sitting outside and watching the trees blow in the breeze. These activities are considered boring to most, even our children. We do things all the while hoping they would just be done and over with so that we could get to the next thing. When you think about how many times you do this in a day, it's overwhelming and terrible to say the least.
All the while, we are trying to find something more stimulating to do and something that is better than what we did before, wishing away time while trying not to age.
Does anyone see the irony in all of this?
The moments we are given cannot be retrieved. You can't get them back. This everyone knows. But the other part is that we can't trick ourselves into thinking that we are cherishing our time when in reality we are wishing it away while planning stimulation for the future.
Inevitably we will get old, and inevitably we will wish back the moments we are in right now. At some point in life we will want to be right where we are today. At that point, we won't be able to get his moment back. So, live you're life knowing that, that at one point you will wish this time back, and that the only way to avoid doing that is to cherish and revel in this moment regardless of its level of enjoyment.
Wow! This quote is frighteningly true. We rush through our weeks, wish away our days, curse our boredom, but then inevitably wonder where the time went when we find ourselves older than we'd like to be.
Part of the problem is our inability as humans to enjoy the precious present moment and to be satisfied with what we have. All of our lives we, as well as our parents, wished us into the future. When we were born, our parents began wishing we could crawl, then walk, then talk. That doesn't necessarily imply that they weren't enjoying our cooing or immobility, but they wanted more and were wishing away time for it to happen.
When we became small children we wished we were big enough to ride the Ferris wheel or to walk in the deep end of the pool- unconsciously hoping time would speed up. And then we became teenagers who wished we were old enough to drive. When we could drive, we wished we could drink legally. When we could drink legally, we wished we were finished school. When we finished school, we wished we had better jobs. When we got better jobs, we wished we had a family. You get the idea.
We have spent our entire lives wishing away time to reach a point where we are at a better place. I would venture to say that once we reach that place, we start to yearn for some of that time back. I do. I look at my responsibilities now and for a split second miss being a kid with no responsibilities, no sense of time, and the naiveness that allows you to be void of worry and love life. I know that my mom sometimes wishes she were my age again, when she had kids to take care of and a family to do things for because it was in that time that she felt purpose. She is enjoying her life but missing the younger days.
The other part of the problem which this quote brings to light is that we spend so much time trying to find something to do with our time that we waste away our time. Again, we are not content with what we have and need more. I believe this comes partly from our need to be stimulated 24/7. In older days, people could sit around a fire and talk, sing, and sit in silence yet still be amused. This day in age, from babies we are given things to stimulate us. We are sat in front of the TV, shown the joys of the internet, and given gadgets to play with. I am not saying these stimulants are negative, but only that we are continuously being entertained. Because of this fact, we are not happy just sitting in silence (unless of course we are stressed to the max and need a little time away), or even just sitting outside and watching the trees blow in the breeze. These activities are considered boring to most, even our children. We do things all the while hoping they would just be done and over with so that we could get to the next thing. When you think about how many times you do this in a day, it's overwhelming and terrible to say the least.
All the while, we are trying to find something more stimulating to do and something that is better than what we did before, wishing away time while trying not to age.
Does anyone see the irony in all of this?
The moments we are given cannot be retrieved. You can't get them back. This everyone knows. But the other part is that we can't trick ourselves into thinking that we are cherishing our time when in reality we are wishing it away while planning stimulation for the future.
Inevitably we will get old, and inevitably we will wish back the moments we are in right now. At some point in life we will want to be right where we are today. At that point, we won't be able to get his moment back. So, live you're life knowing that, that at one point you will wish this time back, and that the only way to avoid doing that is to cherish and revel in this moment regardless of its level of enjoyment.
Live Laugh Love
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Because bound by conditions...it's not love.
"The only love worthy of a name is unconditional." John Powell
I love the color yellow, the feeling of the sand between my toes, a warm summer breeze, forehead kisses, and down comforters. I love a lot of things, but only when I use the word love loosely...that's not unconditional love. Yellow is a pretty color; it is my favorite, but sometimes I prefer green to yellow. The sand between my toes feels amazing, but when it is wet, it's a mushy mess and sort of annoying. A warm summer breeze is nice until I'm really hot and just want the dang air condition. Forehead kisses are pretty much great all the time except if the person giving them just isn't right. Down comforters are SUPER comfy unless the room is way too hot to even want a blanket.
These are conditional "likes". They are not loves. I like all of the above listed things until something better comes along or alterations are made to them.
When we think of unconditional love we tend to think of the love of a parent for their child or the love of a dog for his owner. It is in these forms of love that we can see that no condition is placed on the feeling of love. God intended for all love to be unconditional love. However, we tend to place limitations and expectations on who and what we love. That simply stated isn't love.
When you truly love someone there is nothing they can do that would make that feeling stop...ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! That person could lie, cheat, steal, kill, etc., and you neither physically or emotionally could even force yourself to stop loving them. Unconditional love lasts forever without any restrictions. Love without the unconditional is void of love.
For some reason, we have lost sight of the real representation of love or maybe we never had it to begin with. We say we love someone but only when we see our wants reflected in their actions. It is only when that person is who we would like for them to be that we say we love them. If unconditional love were a way of life, the word love would not exist in a past tense. Because to love would mean to have that feeling eternally, forever. Would you ever say that you once loved your child, father, or mother? No, you will love them even past their deaths because you truly do LOVE those people. Unfortunately, in the world we live in, all too often we hear of a wife who once loved her husband or a man who had love for that woman. The unfortunate part is that people honestly do not realize that what they have placed the title of "love" on, isn't love at all. It is a longing to feel loved and once that longing has been fulfilled, they are content. It isn't until that longing is unfulfilled and the presence of hurt emerges that these people decide to take away their "love".
I am an offender of this kind of loving. I have had relationships and friendships that have ended with me never thinking about that person again, but we were "so in love" in the moment. Those relationships only existed for the purpose of satisfying my wants. Although I gave alot while I was in those relationships, I no longer had a need for them when they ended so the feeling that was associated with them died as well.
God wants us to love as he has loved us. He loves us regardless of our shortcomings. We hurt Him in more ways than we know, and yet still He wants us to be in Heaven with Him. That is love. That is unconditional.
We need to experience the definition of what love is and what love is NOT before we profess our love to one another. If the love you are giving is only being expended for your own personal gratification, then it indeed is false love. The love that you give is true when you can honestly say that the love-ee can do NOTHING to make the feeling the love-er has for them go away.
Unconditional...without any restrictions or limitations.
I love the color yellow, the feeling of the sand between my toes, a warm summer breeze, forehead kisses, and down comforters. I love a lot of things, but only when I use the word love loosely...that's not unconditional love. Yellow is a pretty color; it is my favorite, but sometimes I prefer green to yellow. The sand between my toes feels amazing, but when it is wet, it's a mushy mess and sort of annoying. A warm summer breeze is nice until I'm really hot and just want the dang air condition. Forehead kisses are pretty much great all the time except if the person giving them just isn't right. Down comforters are SUPER comfy unless the room is way too hot to even want a blanket.
These are conditional "likes". They are not loves. I like all of the above listed things until something better comes along or alterations are made to them.
When we think of unconditional love we tend to think of the love of a parent for their child or the love of a dog for his owner. It is in these forms of love that we can see that no condition is placed on the feeling of love. God intended for all love to be unconditional love. However, we tend to place limitations and expectations on who and what we love. That simply stated isn't love.
When you truly love someone there is nothing they can do that would make that feeling stop...ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! That person could lie, cheat, steal, kill, etc., and you neither physically or emotionally could even force yourself to stop loving them. Unconditional love lasts forever without any restrictions. Love without the unconditional is void of love.
For some reason, we have lost sight of the real representation of love or maybe we never had it to begin with. We say we love someone but only when we see our wants reflected in their actions. It is only when that person is who we would like for them to be that we say we love them. If unconditional love were a way of life, the word love would not exist in a past tense. Because to love would mean to have that feeling eternally, forever. Would you ever say that you once loved your child, father, or mother? No, you will love them even past their deaths because you truly do LOVE those people. Unfortunately, in the world we live in, all too often we hear of a wife who once loved her husband or a man who had love for that woman. The unfortunate part is that people honestly do not realize that what they have placed the title of "love" on, isn't love at all. It is a longing to feel loved and once that longing has been fulfilled, they are content. It isn't until that longing is unfulfilled and the presence of hurt emerges that these people decide to take away their "love".
I am an offender of this kind of loving. I have had relationships and friendships that have ended with me never thinking about that person again, but we were "so in love" in the moment. Those relationships only existed for the purpose of satisfying my wants. Although I gave alot while I was in those relationships, I no longer had a need for them when they ended so the feeling that was associated with them died as well.
God wants us to love as he has loved us. He loves us regardless of our shortcomings. We hurt Him in more ways than we know, and yet still He wants us to be in Heaven with Him. That is love. That is unconditional.
We need to experience the definition of what love is and what love is NOT before we profess our love to one another. If the love you are giving is only being expended for your own personal gratification, then it indeed is false love. The love that you give is true when you can honestly say that the love-ee can do NOTHING to make the feeling the love-er has for them go away.
Unconditional...without any restrictions or limitations.
Friday, April 9, 2010
Who's life is this anyway...
But I am afraid that as the serpent deceived Eve by his cunning, your thoughts will be led astray from a sincere and pure devotion to Christ.
—2 Corinthians 11:3
So satan finds a way to steal your joy on every occassion that should add to it. This was proven to me this weekend after my baptism. I was and am on fire for God and was and am PUMPED to give my life to Him in the form of batism. I stepped down in that water and felt a cleansing like no other come over me, fill me, and cosume me. I have never felt as clean, holy, and proud as I did on Easter Sunday.
But that slowly changed...
You see satan saw my pure joy and was angry enough to try to take it away. He used the people closest to me as he usually does to make me feel as though the act of baptism was in some way a billboard that I was now perfect. I have given my life to God but that doesn't mean that I'm not a sinner or that I don't do sometimes stupid things. What it does mean is that I know that this life I am living isn't mine. This life is my God's life. He is using me for some purpose to do what he sees fit with me. While God has his clutches on me, satan is steadily trying to push me back down to my breaking point so that I will give up and say that I am already a sinner so sinning is acceptable.
I am not in this life to please others nor am I here to listen to their infinite wisdom regarding what my life should consist of. I am here to please my God who know that I am a mistake-maker, a false representation of His perfect vision of me but who loves me unconditionally despite my shortcomings. It is His life that I live imperfectly to perfection because He knows the desires of my heart and the strength of satan.
So when God has you on fire and ready to shout to the world that you are His, watch out for the vices satan uses to pull you back down (and he will). And remember that God has already written the novel of your life. He knows the error of your ways and the goodness of your heart, and yet still He loves us so much for living His live and fulfilling the purpose we play in his master plan.
—2 Corinthians 11:3
So satan finds a way to steal your joy on every occassion that should add to it. This was proven to me this weekend after my baptism. I was and am on fire for God and was and am PUMPED to give my life to Him in the form of batism. I stepped down in that water and felt a cleansing like no other come over me, fill me, and cosume me. I have never felt as clean, holy, and proud as I did on Easter Sunday.
But that slowly changed...
You see satan saw my pure joy and was angry enough to try to take it away. He used the people closest to me as he usually does to make me feel as though the act of baptism was in some way a billboard that I was now perfect. I have given my life to God but that doesn't mean that I'm not a sinner or that I don't do sometimes stupid things. What it does mean is that I know that this life I am living isn't mine. This life is my God's life. He is using me for some purpose to do what he sees fit with me. While God has his clutches on me, satan is steadily trying to push me back down to my breaking point so that I will give up and say that I am already a sinner so sinning is acceptable.
I am not in this life to please others nor am I here to listen to their infinite wisdom regarding what my life should consist of. I am here to please my God who know that I am a mistake-maker, a false representation of His perfect vision of me but who loves me unconditionally despite my shortcomings. It is His life that I live imperfectly to perfection because He knows the desires of my heart and the strength of satan.
So when God has you on fire and ready to shout to the world that you are His, watch out for the vices satan uses to pull you back down (and he will). And remember that God has already written the novel of your life. He knows the error of your ways and the goodness of your heart, and yet still He loves us so much for living His live and fulfilling the purpose we play in his master plan.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Treat others as THEY want to be treated...and get treated the way YOU want to be treated...
“Men are motivated and empowered when they feel needed. Women are motivated and empowered when they feel cherished.” - John Gray -Author of "Women are from MARS, Men are from Venus"
WOW! How true this statement is! I haven't actually taken advantage of the infinite wisdom of Mr. Gray and read his book. However, I do hear that women don't particularly find the content remarkable, to say the least. If the book is anything like this one quote, I NEED to invest in a copy.
Unfortunately, the quote above drastically conflicts with one of the main principles taught to us as children, thus making both confusing. The sole problem is that many people, myself included, have been taught to treat others as they want to be treated. Well, that just doesn't work with someone who isn't on the same universal plane as you. Instead one must treat others as THEY want to be treated.
I am learning firsthand that you can't expect others to be satisfied with what would make you content. If you give what you want, you get no response, even if you make sure to communicate it. To get what you want you have to give what they want. If a man yearns to be needed, then as independent as I am, I must show him that he is needed to get what I want, which is to feel cherished. The problem is that I am NOT a man and do not know what actions will produce the result of feeling needed.
A feeling of necessity is, to me, doing things for others, but what is it for a man to feel needed? I still after diligent thinking do not have the answer for this. I think a man's desire to feel needed is ultimately a way to feed their ego, a way to make them feel as if they have something that others of their gender are lacking. (Obviously they do, or you wouldn't have picked them, but apparently that isn't enough in the way of reassurance). I'm certain that acts such as telling them how amazing they are and how much you appreciate the things they do work in your favor. However, I am not so sure that words are enough for men. They need you to show them that they are needed and not in the general sense. They don't want to help you open the pickle jar, which by the way you can do yourself with a couple quick taps of the handle end of a butter knife. Try it. It works! To feed a man's ego and to make him feel like he is needed, you have to inquire his advice on certain issues, even if you have already made your mind up. Ask him what you should do about the promotion at work, if you're making the right decision with your asks of your children, if there are different exercises you should be doing to strengthen your glutes....you get the idea! Make him feel like you are smart and intelligent but that you need his expertise to make the final decision. That will feed his ego. He will think "Wow! She needed me to make that decision!" You really didn't NEED him you just wanted his opinion, but that translates differently to a man. It's actually a simple case of inclusion. Include your guy in your world. Make him feel like he is a part of it. Make him feel like he is the only man that could helped you in this situation. As simple as it seems, most people forget somehow to do this and they man feels like you could take him or leave him.
The desire to be cherished is what fuels women. We do the things we do so that you will think "Wow! I have her. I am so lucky. No one could make me as happy as she does. I couldn't imagine life without her..." This is again a way to feed the ego but not in the same way. We want to know that you picked us for a reason and that our flaws as well as our positive attributes are the reason you're by our side. We don't care about being needed. We do things as a result of our genetic make up as caregivers not for the glory and praise. But for all the things we do, we expect to be cherished. Not everyone will do it the way we do. No difficulty lies in showing a woman she is cherished. Just tell her. Tell her that she is unique and that you wake up everyday grateful that she's beside you. It's just that easy.
All of this is because we are a society of envy and comparison. We criticize ourselves based on our perception of others and thus become jealous of what they have that you lack which causes you to not measure up. Everyone does this secure or insecure. This attitude is the ultimate reason that we NEED anything from our significant other to feel good. If we didn't fall into the trap of comparison, we wouldn't have a desire to feel needed or cherished, we would just be.
Our needs from our significant other obviously contrast with the lesson we were taught at a young age. You simply have to get to know the person you're with and give them what it is that makes them feel the emotions they desire to feel. I have generalized it here. It gets broader because different people have different desires. The main point is that to get what you want out of them don't do to them or give them what you like. Attempt to do and give what it is you like and don't expect them to take the hint from your actions. Communicate what you want and like. Tell them what makes you tick. If they don't act on it...well keep it moving.
We all need other people in our lives and we need them to do certain things for us. The problem lies in getting them to do those things. Simply put "give what they want and get what you want".
WOW! How true this statement is! I haven't actually taken advantage of the infinite wisdom of Mr. Gray and read his book. However, I do hear that women don't particularly find the content remarkable, to say the least. If the book is anything like this one quote, I NEED to invest in a copy.
Unfortunately, the quote above drastically conflicts with one of the main principles taught to us as children, thus making both confusing. The sole problem is that many people, myself included, have been taught to treat others as they want to be treated. Well, that just doesn't work with someone who isn't on the same universal plane as you. Instead one must treat others as THEY want to be treated.
I am learning firsthand that you can't expect others to be satisfied with what would make you content. If you give what you want, you get no response, even if you make sure to communicate it. To get what you want you have to give what they want. If a man yearns to be needed, then as independent as I am, I must show him that he is needed to get what I want, which is to feel cherished. The problem is that I am NOT a man and do not know what actions will produce the result of feeling needed.
A feeling of necessity is, to me, doing things for others, but what is it for a man to feel needed? I still after diligent thinking do not have the answer for this. I think a man's desire to feel needed is ultimately a way to feed their ego, a way to make them feel as if they have something that others of their gender are lacking. (Obviously they do, or you wouldn't have picked them, but apparently that isn't enough in the way of reassurance). I'm certain that acts such as telling them how amazing they are and how much you appreciate the things they do work in your favor. However, I am not so sure that words are enough for men. They need you to show them that they are needed and not in the general sense. They don't want to help you open the pickle jar, which by the way you can do yourself with a couple quick taps of the handle end of a butter knife. Try it. It works! To feed a man's ego and to make him feel like he is needed, you have to inquire his advice on certain issues, even if you have already made your mind up. Ask him what you should do about the promotion at work, if you're making the right decision with your asks of your children, if there are different exercises you should be doing to strengthen your glutes....you get the idea! Make him feel like you are smart and intelligent but that you need his expertise to make the final decision. That will feed his ego. He will think "Wow! She needed me to make that decision!" You really didn't NEED him you just wanted his opinion, but that translates differently to a man. It's actually a simple case of inclusion. Include your guy in your world. Make him feel like he is a part of it. Make him feel like he is the only man that could helped you in this situation. As simple as it seems, most people forget somehow to do this and they man feels like you could take him or leave him.
The desire to be cherished is what fuels women. We do the things we do so that you will think "Wow! I have her. I am so lucky. No one could make me as happy as she does. I couldn't imagine life without her..." This is again a way to feed the ego but not in the same way. We want to know that you picked us for a reason and that our flaws as well as our positive attributes are the reason you're by our side. We don't care about being needed. We do things as a result of our genetic make up as caregivers not for the glory and praise. But for all the things we do, we expect to be cherished. Not everyone will do it the way we do. No difficulty lies in showing a woman she is cherished. Just tell her. Tell her that she is unique and that you wake up everyday grateful that she's beside you. It's just that easy.
All of this is because we are a society of envy and comparison. We criticize ourselves based on our perception of others and thus become jealous of what they have that you lack which causes you to not measure up. Everyone does this secure or insecure. This attitude is the ultimate reason that we NEED anything from our significant other to feel good. If we didn't fall into the trap of comparison, we wouldn't have a desire to feel needed or cherished, we would just be.
Our needs from our significant other obviously contrast with the lesson we were taught at a young age. You simply have to get to know the person you're with and give them what it is that makes them feel the emotions they desire to feel. I have generalized it here. It gets broader because different people have different desires. The main point is that to get what you want out of them don't do to them or give them what you like. Attempt to do and give what it is you like and don't expect them to take the hint from your actions. Communicate what you want and like. Tell them what makes you tick. If they don't act on it...well keep it moving.
We all need other people in our lives and we need them to do certain things for us. The problem lies in getting them to do those things. Simply put "give what they want and get what you want".
Friday, June 26, 2009
A legacy that lives on...
"The legacy of heroes is the memory of a great name and the inheritance of a great example." -Benjamin Diraeli (British Prime Minister and Novelist)
R.I.P. Mr. Micheal Jackson. You have touched more lives than you will ever know. You will be remembered!
So Micheal Jackson passed away suddenly yesterday. No one expected it. No one believed it. A whole world of mourning started when the LA coroners office confirmed the awful truth. Micheal Jackson had passed away at the age of 50 from cardiac arrest.
The sudden passing of Mr. MJ cause me to start to think about who he was, what he meant to so many people, his tormented soul, but most of all the legacy he left, for his children, family, and the world to respect and with which to live.
No one knows when his time on Earth is up. It's already written when you will go, but the MAN above is the only person with the key to those records. Because your knowledge of the end of your existence is unknown, you must always prepare for this to be your last day. Add to your legacy every day you are here.
For MJ, as troubled as he was, everyday was just an addition to the legacy he left us with starting yesterday. And ultimately the legacy you leave is what matters. What will people say about you when you are gone? Did you make enough of an impression for the wrongs you did to be forgotten? What will your obituary/eulogy say? If you live your life as if you are creating a legacy, those won't be questions.
When I was thinking about the quote above, I pondered how to dissect it. Wondered about the meanings of the word legacy then I realized the word "HERO". A pretty strong word with which to start the quote. Actually, this word in the quote almost made me read on to more quotes to find the right quote of the day. Then I realized that a hero doesn't have to be a president or a firefighter or hold any title other than their name. You may be a hero to your child, to a neighbor, to your mother. My son, for example is a hero to my mom. Anyone can hold the title hero and not even be aware. Heroism again is in the eye of the beholder.
So this quote is not limiting at all. The quote actual makes you think more deeply about its meaning when you delve into the word "Hero" a little more.
When creating your legacy, you must remind yourself of it daily. Make sure that all of your actions are a staircase to the legacy you wish to leave. Outsiders should perceive your actions as a part of who you are and what you represent. If you want to be remembered for being a hard worker, well, you work hard. If you want people to acknowledge your extreme faith, you walk every road with God. However, you can't just do the actions, you must let it be known, be proud of your abilities to resemble that characteristic. If you make every action an example of the legacy you wish to leave, you have no choice but to create that existence for yourself. If you work diligently at it, you will be the example in people's life of what that characteristic means. Just like Micheal was a Pop Icon and a Music Mastery. People in your inner circle will use you as the example of that trait. Remember Karey...she was what a good mother, teacher, hard worker...should be.
Which leads me to my next point, you must create your legacy by example. You want your name to be valued and known and for your children to remember you as a wonderful person. The way to do that is to make sure you are a positive example to them. Make sure that if you want them to be a hard worker, you work hard. If you want them to be a lover and peacemaker, you do those things as well. The ultimate goal is to create a legacy the people you are leaving it for will live by, thus making their legacy when they're gone even stronger.
You must leave them with the idea to treasure so that they too will want the same for their families and so on. Your legacy paves the path for legacies after you and after them. Be an example of what you want that legacy to be perceived as and stick to it. None of this "Do as I say not as I do" mentality. Lead your family and people who love you down the right path whether through your personal path or through the legacy you leave when you are gone.
Think about what you want your legacy to be and start living it today. Your not alone, I'm starting this today too.
I want to be known for being a WONDERFUL caretaker, a great mother, a peacemaker, a hard worker, someone who doesn't complain and gets the job done, a Christ lover, a kind spirit, humorous, someone who is confident and walks with their head held high, a goal setter and seeker. I am going to start being a better example of these things today!
Happy legacy making! :)
R.I.P. Mr. Micheal Jackson. You have touched more lives than you will ever know. You will be remembered!
So Micheal Jackson passed away suddenly yesterday. No one expected it. No one believed it. A whole world of mourning started when the LA coroners office confirmed the awful truth. Micheal Jackson had passed away at the age of 50 from cardiac arrest.
The sudden passing of Mr. MJ cause me to start to think about who he was, what he meant to so many people, his tormented soul, but most of all the legacy he left, for his children, family, and the world to respect and with which to live.
No one knows when his time on Earth is up. It's already written when you will go, but the MAN above is the only person with the key to those records. Because your knowledge of the end of your existence is unknown, you must always prepare for this to be your last day. Add to your legacy every day you are here.
For MJ, as troubled as he was, everyday was just an addition to the legacy he left us with starting yesterday. And ultimately the legacy you leave is what matters. What will people say about you when you are gone? Did you make enough of an impression for the wrongs you did to be forgotten? What will your obituary/eulogy say? If you live your life as if you are creating a legacy, those won't be questions.
When I was thinking about the quote above, I pondered how to dissect it. Wondered about the meanings of the word legacy then I realized the word "HERO". A pretty strong word with which to start the quote. Actually, this word in the quote almost made me read on to more quotes to find the right quote of the day. Then I realized that a hero doesn't have to be a president or a firefighter or hold any title other than their name. You may be a hero to your child, to a neighbor, to your mother. My son, for example is a hero to my mom. Anyone can hold the title hero and not even be aware. Heroism again is in the eye of the beholder.
So this quote is not limiting at all. The quote actual makes you think more deeply about its meaning when you delve into the word "Hero" a little more.
When creating your legacy, you must remind yourself of it daily. Make sure that all of your actions are a staircase to the legacy you wish to leave. Outsiders should perceive your actions as a part of who you are and what you represent. If you want to be remembered for being a hard worker, well, you work hard. If you want people to acknowledge your extreme faith, you walk every road with God. However, you can't just do the actions, you must let it be known, be proud of your abilities to resemble that characteristic. If you make every action an example of the legacy you wish to leave, you have no choice but to create that existence for yourself. If you work diligently at it, you will be the example in people's life of what that characteristic means. Just like Micheal was a Pop Icon and a Music Mastery. People in your inner circle will use you as the example of that trait. Remember Karey...she was what a good mother, teacher, hard worker...should be.
Which leads me to my next point, you must create your legacy by example. You want your name to be valued and known and for your children to remember you as a wonderful person. The way to do that is to make sure you are a positive example to them. Make sure that if you want them to be a hard worker, you work hard. If you want them to be a lover and peacemaker, you do those things as well. The ultimate goal is to create a legacy the people you are leaving it for will live by, thus making their legacy when they're gone even stronger.
You must leave them with the idea to treasure so that they too will want the same for their families and so on. Your legacy paves the path for legacies after you and after them. Be an example of what you want that legacy to be perceived as and stick to it. None of this "Do as I say not as I do" mentality. Lead your family and people who love you down the right path whether through your personal path or through the legacy you leave when you are gone.
Think about what you want your legacy to be and start living it today. Your not alone, I'm starting this today too.
I want to be known for being a WONDERFUL caretaker, a great mother, a peacemaker, a hard worker, someone who doesn't complain and gets the job done, a Christ lover, a kind spirit, humorous, someone who is confident and walks with their head held high, a goal setter and seeker. I am going to start being a better example of these things today!
Happy legacy making! :)
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Counterproductivity...
"I cannot give you the sure-fire formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure--which is: Try to please everybody all the time." -Herbert Bayard Swope
This history behind the quote (just because I need to assure you and myself that he was at least educated :) ):
Herbert Bayard Swope was a Pulitzer Prize winner for reporting. He was the American reporter who invented the op-ed piece which took the fact out of a page of the news and added some enlightening opinion.
This quote is probably one of my favorites on so many levels but mainly because of the absolute truth in it! Everyone wants to be successful and refuses failure as an option, but the mute point usually is the reason behind the failure. Success is vague. Success is determined by the eye of the beholder. Some deem small things a success and others wait for the big break to feel fulfilled. Because of the ambiguity of success, determining a universal means to reach it, is almost impossible. However, across the board, certainty exists in the fact that trying to please everyone else all the time deters you from your success.
I have been presented with this theory in life time and time again. My character flaws are many, but this one creates the most annoyance for me. I ultimately desire to rid myself of the need for acceptance that looms over me. If I could go through the day thinking of only myself and the happiness I create for me, I would be a much happier... Perplexing, I know. The happiness I intend to gain by making others happy could be properly attained if I would only worry about making myself happy. Hmmm... a nice thought; unfortunately, my mind is not trained this way. My mind is trained to think about other people all the time. To put it mildly with uneducated vocabulary : IT SUCKS!
I find myself sweating bullets when I'm driving and someone behind me is driving rather closely to my bumper not because I am irritated that if I slammed on my breaks this guy would be in my front seat, but conversely because I am worried that this "John Doe" is angry with me that I am in his way and going too slowly! RIDICULOUS! Pretty frequently I am found in these awkward situations with similar emotions running through my head. As a side note: Please realize that some people in your life are Bi-polar and do not know from minute to minute what makes them happy let alone what you can do to make them happy. Take it as a loss. You cannot please these people. They are toxic!
The fact of the matter is everyone, whether it be a friend, family member, or complete stranger, has an expectation of you. But why? One must assume that they are attempting to fulfill some kind of desire for themself through this expectation of you. (Because I mean let's face it : Most people are out for themselves and don't share this same desire for world happiness as you do). Because of this assumption, it is safe to say that they will gain something through their expectation of you. Otherwise, they wouldn't care enough to have that expectation to begin with!
In the end though, you are the one stuck trying to make a group of people happy who may share different views and ideas of what is the appropriate action for you. After reading the quote, you can see that it's not the act of trying to please people in general that leads to failure, it's the act of trying to please people (notice the plural) all of the time. It cannot be done. It will lead to your demise and more importantly to the failure of your goals and thus to your unsuccessfullness.
You possess ownership of your success. It is yours and you are the only person that can get you there. Thus ensuring your own happiness is the tried and true way for you to reach your successes in life. And if you find that there are a BUNCH of people who are disapproving...ask the one whose opinion really matters and pray on it. You control your destiny but He has already written it!
Make yourself happy today! :)
This history behind the quote (just because I need to assure you and myself that he was at least educated :) ):
Herbert Bayard Swope was a Pulitzer Prize winner for reporting. He was the American reporter who invented the op-ed piece which took the fact out of a page of the news and added some enlightening opinion.
This quote is probably one of my favorites on so many levels but mainly because of the absolute truth in it! Everyone wants to be successful and refuses failure as an option, but the mute point usually is the reason behind the failure. Success is vague. Success is determined by the eye of the beholder. Some deem small things a success and others wait for the big break to feel fulfilled. Because of the ambiguity of success, determining a universal means to reach it, is almost impossible. However, across the board, certainty exists in the fact that trying to please everyone else all the time deters you from your success.
I have been presented with this theory in life time and time again. My character flaws are many, but this one creates the most annoyance for me. I ultimately desire to rid myself of the need for acceptance that looms over me. If I could go through the day thinking of only myself and the happiness I create for me, I would be a much happier... Perplexing, I know. The happiness I intend to gain by making others happy could be properly attained if I would only worry about making myself happy. Hmmm... a nice thought; unfortunately, my mind is not trained this way. My mind is trained to think about other people all the time. To put it mildly with uneducated vocabulary : IT SUCKS!
I find myself sweating bullets when I'm driving and someone behind me is driving rather closely to my bumper not because I am irritated that if I slammed on my breaks this guy would be in my front seat, but conversely because I am worried that this "John Doe" is angry with me that I am in his way and going too slowly! RIDICULOUS! Pretty frequently I am found in these awkward situations with similar emotions running through my head. As a side note: Please realize that some people in your life are Bi-polar and do not know from minute to minute what makes them happy let alone what you can do to make them happy. Take it as a loss. You cannot please these people. They are toxic!
The fact of the matter is everyone, whether it be a friend, family member, or complete stranger, has an expectation of you. But why? One must assume that they are attempting to fulfill some kind of desire for themself through this expectation of you. (Because I mean let's face it : Most people are out for themselves and don't share this same desire for world happiness as you do). Because of this assumption, it is safe to say that they will gain something through their expectation of you. Otherwise, they wouldn't care enough to have that expectation to begin with!
In the end though, you are the one stuck trying to make a group of people happy who may share different views and ideas of what is the appropriate action for you. After reading the quote, you can see that it's not the act of trying to please people in general that leads to failure, it's the act of trying to please people (notice the plural) all of the time. It cannot be done. It will lead to your demise and more importantly to the failure of your goals and thus to your unsuccessfullness.
You possess ownership of your success. It is yours and you are the only person that can get you there. Thus ensuring your own happiness is the tried and true way for you to reach your successes in life. And if you find that there are a BUNCH of people who are disapproving...ask the one whose opinion really matters and pray on it. You control your destiny but He has already written it!
Make yourself happy today! :)
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